of heartbreak so unbearable
there isn’t a guy in this world who could break my heart more cruelly than the poverty at my doorstep. it’s heart wrenching that while i decide, I have nothing to wear even though I have 2 wardrobes worth of clothes. There are children walking around in tattered rags. There is poverty rampant around us and yet we do nothing. Don’t give money to the beggars, we are told or they...
of december nights under the full moon
I was born in a sleepy port deadsmack in the middle of the philippines. I had very humble beginnings. Costa Baena which now stretches in Ibo, with it’s majestic walls and sprawling turrets, was once a simple concrete hut with a straw roof. back then I lived in this tiny hut with my mum and my little sister. I was 2 but these were also my earliest memories. and until the day i die. i will...
Of thesis and voters
Voter Behaviour Under Asymmetric Information in Compulsory and Voluntary Voting Systems: An Experimental Study
Milk brewed Coffee in golden cans
I don’t think YOU know just how easy it is to love YOU. I don’t think YOU know how long I have loved YOU. And I don’t think YOU’ll understand the reasons that we can never be together. YOU would be my happiest happiness and my most sorrowful sorrow. That is the extent of how much I love YOU. I will never leave YOU behind, no matter how far away we are from each other. I...
Of Basic Au Revoirs
It’s my last week at work. It feels odd. Why does it feel surreal? I understand that there are moments when I feel as if I really can’t spend another day in this place and yet here I am patiently waiting for the last day and I can’t help but be saddened by the thought of leaving people behind. It’s interesting that a friend told me today, by the time I come back to Sydney,...
Of leather skirts and freisens ghost
A good friend of mine, who happens to break all the rules of existence (non asian maths genius, polite lebanese youngster who loves blonde chubby asians) recently advised me to be a ‘girl’. Point one being, I should start wearing heels with a skirt. I’m in love with my Adidas Death Star shoes and my Onitsuka Tigers Tokyo Mid. Also I love my basketball shorts and I wear...
Love isn’t natural. It needs to be cultivated and harvested before the winter of time ravage the fruits of your labour.
I need examples of a decent convo involving nipples one that will incur giggles instead of a slap.
Do not ride after a heavy night of drinking without eating first
Let’s play the blame game. I love you. More. Let’s play the blame game for sure.
Things that hit the spot
Massage Getting your teeth cleaned Eating what you are craving. Warm snuggly blanket on a cold rainy day Cleaning your ears. Yeah it’s fcked up but there are things I would rather do than have sex. It’s so unfulfilling and awkward. I always say I would never sleep with an ugly guy but the truth is I have and now i am tempted with the idea of marrying for money. Unfortunately I am...
strawberry bizcocho in a tumbler
sat in front of me abound with glorious strawberries and soft chocolate cake smothered in milk chocolate and custard lightly topped by peanuts. Yes it was delicious. It was mind numbing and it took my breath away. Literally. So now I’m craving it.
Has there been a day slower than this?
Sorry @BrunoMars but in accordance with death of the author, I will now be claiming The Lazy Song for myself, as the producer of meaning. Ha
Im going to make a deal with the dealers of fate if I get one sign one sign that you’re it. I will stop killing kittens. For 3 years.
one day when the moon was full...
i thought of you on my ride home. how it would feel to walk beside you. and i remember all the things that made me giddy at the thought of you. i wish you were tangible. and i could feel a thousand deaths just to feel your arms for a short second. my hands remember the way yours brushed mine ever so softly. i wonder what you smell like. i’ve forgotten already.
According to genetics I am a man with female parts and my ex’s are women with male parts. I don’t know who is more confused.
Men with sexy arms and subsequently sexy arms should be illegal. I volunteer to round them up.
Half of my family have ugly kids cause they married for money. The other half are poor.
I ride a blue and white bicycle. It’s my thing. Everyone has a thing. I ride a bike cause my thighs they are awesome.
I pity the fool who falls in love with me
After much darkness and subsequent dullness my voice has returned sharper perhaps than it once was.
because sometimes blue is the first choice
When I was young I cut my thigh open. I was sliding down a lumber stair case and split the flesh. As I tell him this he smiles politely. He wants to ask me if he can see the scar. If he can touch it. You can lick it if you want, I say with an open tooth smile. He looks uncomfortable. He taps the edge of the white notepad with his blue pen. He does that thing that people do when they don’t believe...
Memories of distant futures
People are shaped by memory. Memory is linked to the senses. How we remember things depends on the present state of things. Memory has no context. It has no definite state of being as it changes depending on its retelling and the way that it is remembered in the physical. Scars are an example of this. The body as a memory recorder. Sense as a memory recorder. Photographs as a memory recorder....
is happiness. Isn’t it? It’s waking up in the morning knowing that all is well with the world. Except it’s not the same calibre of ‘well’ that you wake up to every morning. This isn’t Shakespeare. Just because the sun is shining it doesn’t mean that everything is well in the world. It doesn’t mean there isn’t a big fat debt in your bank account, your phone bill and your credit card. It doesn’t...
False Impressions of Rain Time Departures
In the mornings she brushed her teeth. She no longer thought of him standing behind her playing with her hair, or tracing her shoulders with his fingers. She began to forget the way he would lean on the sink and nuzzle the back of her neck. One weekend, without thinking she put away his mug. The same day as she shredded the bills, she dropped his photo in the wastebasket and failed to notice it as...
Study requires solitude, and solitude is a state dangerous to those who are too...– Samuel Johnson
Iron Wrought beginnings
Once, before she became Susie’s friend, Lisa fell in love with a chair. It was wrought iron. White with the strong metal smell that always hovered over rustic chairs. She found it one day while she was browsing at an op shop. Lisa loved vintage. Vintage bags. Vintage prints. Vintage trousers. She loved mixing the old with the new with the eclectic. A tribal horn she found in Bali sitting on an urn...
‘You know what love is? It’s a red umbrella in a sea of black umbrellas. Everyone has one. Any one of those umbrellas can serve their purpose to cover you from the rain. If all you want is something to protect you from the rain then just grab the umbrella closest to you. Any one will do. But it’s not enough. Love is just another word for pride. It’s the luxury of having someone else love you. But...
Learning how to sink
You walk up the other side of the beach closer to where the hike trail opens up to a cliff. You photograph the waves crashing against the rocks below. You stood here with a boy once, after school. He gave you a share of his lunch. In that moment, as you quietly chewed his mum’s homemade muffin, you wondered why the houses on the other island looked more like animals than buildings. “What are you...
of rabbits and make believe
Moon Rabbit sat alone on his corner of the sky, peering down at the world below. There were fireworks and spotlights, and singing (some shouting mixed in with the singing) and dancing, and (he assumed) lots and lots of food. For celebrations almost involved food. He laid on his little cloud with his feet up in the air and his head turned upside down as he strained to get a closer look at all the...
First rainy day of summer
So apparently we’re caught in a little game. You smile at me. I smile at you. And all the while we wonder if the other is genuine. It’s gone again. That fleeting moment of clarity between your hand brushing past my shoulder and there goes my stomach again. Tumbling upside down at the sound of your laughter. And there goes my brain again rung away again. I came all this way to see...
Clear skies and summer lies
I lied tonight. I didn’t mean to. I felt pressured. And now from that one tiny lie stems this greater lie. And I am no longer sure if I like you. Cause if I like you I would just tell him instead of not telling him. I lied to my bestfriend. How can you lie to your best friend? He asked me about you and I lied. And I’m going to lie to him again. I can feel it. I have to break the lie....